"Catch A Falling Star" will be in my nightmares.

I guess my theory that LAX only gets happy endings is non-existent now . . . And I guess the questions I have been asking are not the questions they ever plan on answering either. That said . . .

“Sundown” was an incredibly powerful episode for me, for a few reasons. The fact that Sayid has always ALWAYS struggled to be a good man and live down his past but never seems to catch a break in that respect is so heart wrenching to me. The parallel of what was happening on the Island and what was happening in LAX is what made me hurt so much for him. In LAX, he’s this man who is in love with a woman he will never have because he won’t allow himself to have her (and she’s, you know, married to his brother). Knowing that he was always doomed to lose her was just awful. He fights against having to face these men his brother has gotten involved with, only to face them and kill them in the end anyway. Back on the island he’s told over and over again that he has darkness, an evil, inside him, and he’s essentially been fighting his own darkness throughout the series. Now he can’t escape it so he accepts defeat and succumbs to it in the end. It was so damn tragic. I seriously was close to tears, and that’s probably an overreaction, but it really got to me. Hydra is probably shaking his head with him knowing that it doesn’t take much for me to cry about, well, anything . . . BUT I MEAN IT!!

THEN THAT ENDING! The use of “Catch A Falling Star” was genius, and eerie. It made that scene so emotionally charged; my heart was beating a million beats a second by the time the episode ended. That look between Smokey-Locke and Kate was intense, too. She has no idea what she has gotten herself into and I am terrified for her. Although, I am kind of sort of angry that she is going to be within the vicinity of Sawyer again. I feel like Kate telling Claire that she planned on taking Claire back to Aaron has gotten Kate off the hook, but I don’t trust Crazy Claire, because SHE’S CRAZY! Emilie de Ravin is adorably beautiful, and there isn’t a lot you can do to mess that up, but I cannot seem to jump on the “Claire is sexy as a crazy person” train, I’m sorry. All I see is a crazy person, and I don’t think that’s a bad thing to recognize in my defense.

I will whole-heartedly agree that Ben’s reaction was perfect and I am going to miss Michael Emerson as Ben when the series ends. He is truly remarkable and has deserved every nomination and award he has received. I am excited to learn more about him and even potentially see his demise next week. Not that I want to see him die, I have actually never wanted to see him die, but the writers said a lot of characters would be dying this season and I guess it’s time to face the music. So who do you think will live/die in this final season? How do you think they will meet their end?

Speaking of people dying . . . I knew it. I knew Dogan would die because I really liked his character. Sigh. It seemed natural for Lennon to follow, I suppose. Dogan being in “The Lighthouse” in the LAX timeline makes more sense to me now, since I suppose he wound up on the island after 1977. Seeing his son at the Conservatory is much sadder to me now, however. Ben being there still doesn’t make sense to me yet, but perhaps we will get answers on that next week. Us get answers? How silly of me to even suggest something so preposterous!

There is a small theory floating around that I think bears mentioning. The theory is that Jack will wind up as the new “Jacob” and Sawyer will wind up as the new “Smokey” and perhaps Hugo will wind up as the new “Richard” and it will all end as the same scene between Smokey and Jacob in the finale last season, on the beach. This is all assuming that the show even goes this direction, and I am not fully on board with this theory, but I think it is an awesome image if nothing else. I honestly have no idea how this is all going to end. It makes me really nervous that: A) The writers have only JUST started writing the finale. It should be in a vault, already written. I thought I heard that Matthew Fox was the only cast member who knew how it was ending? and B) They are having a contest for people to send in their own endings for the show. The latter could just be so that the writers can laugh at how far off we are from the truth, but I still don’t like it. Sorry for my constant wavering faith, guys. It must be frustrating.

As for Jin and Sun, I feel as though they will be the one constant in the end. I don’t think either of them will die and it just seems as though the writers are building up to an incredible reunion between the two of them. The Lepidus/Ilana crew is going to kick some ass I can feel it. Remember, she still has the bag of Jacob’s ashes with her, which has GOT to mean something. I can’t wait. I love Lepidus. It might be because he has such dreamy eyes, or just an overall dreamy face, but I am pretty sure it’s because he is a badass. Man oh man oh man oh man I cannot wait. I CAN’T WAIT! SO MANY CAPS AND EXCLAMATION POINTS!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

I’ll see you next week. I’ve been drinking wine, so this could get ridiculous if I don’t stop now.

The Pearl